on Sunday, September 19, 2004
well, had a very very late night last night that was filled with cs. yes cs. i have reinstalled that game back into my comp and i can say this fo sho that 1.6 sucks big cock. esp on the internet when u have cheating dicks, abusing admins, stupid admin mods, people spoiling the fun out of lame maps, idiot hardcore campers, the list goes on. all 5 hours since 11 last night was just cs becos i ran out of steam for maths and steam has finished dlling cs. pun indeed.
but, gomenasai once again cos i forgot to blog. hohoho. how terrible, explains y i had this horrible thoughts last nigh trying to coax myself to sleep after hours of endless virtual bloodshed.
i was wondering what life wud be after formalised school. formalised as in school uniforms, fixed timetables and all those shit. yes, shit, esp when we are in it now, but its only towards the end when u realise the beauty of it, and that u actually like it very much! honestly, aft this yr, when can we ever do this : aft sch, whole class just go out to town and slack, or pon class tog and do all sorts of class stuff. best part yet is actually the uniform dammit i think i will miss it.
honestly, we will never ever get to recreate these kind of close kinships and camaradarie again next time, even in the u's cos u go thru different modules u see different people, and next yr guys we're in the army and that is kinda worse. regimented camaradarie is certainly not something im looking forward to. when prelims is over, gotta appreciate that last 2 weeks of school life. really gotta, cos this will be the last 2-3 weeks of our lives in fixed classrooms! aft dat, its off to the fucked up barracks for me. oh well, blame it on myself for not being able to pull this fat shit bulk up that damned scrawny bar.
anyways, it also kept me thinking, will it be friends who will remind u of the one of the best 2 yrs u ever had, our JC years? will it be friends or just dusty photographs hidden on the shelf or lost somewhere in the bowels of your computer, or just forgotten memories. thinking abt it, its just hard to keep in touch with anybody. all it takes is just abt a few months of not seeing each other everyday and then the close friends we have now might just become a memory.
honestly, who still keeps in touch with the rest of their sec 1/2 classmates? or some of ur sec3/4 friends? and of cos pri sch? i know i dont really do that. all that i can remember abt those times are just the memories i have in my head and those class photos we had. Question now, then do friends have an expiry date? do we just forget who that person was or lose contact with, those people whom we spend almost half our time in school off school.
especially when we're going into the army. comeon, different units, training units, camps and all sorta shit. and a greater number will probably fly overseas for studies, and aft dat, work and all.
really, this isnt a very nice feeling, knowing that the end is near, and yet u cant do anything to stop it from ending. as much as i wud like to believe in Friends Forever and all those shit, harsh reality tells us that circumstances change and so do your path diverge from ur friends. and im really really not looking forward for JC life to end, even though when i started school at cj i was wanting it to end. i was bitter for not going to my school of choice, ie SAJC (david : SOC LOL!). i'd take that back now, i really am not looking forward to its end. i cant imagine how life in the army wud be like, which is the next phase of my life. will the same friendliness and kinship prevail in the camp as it did in the classroom? or will it be a shittier form of it all. oh hot damn im not crying now but this talk is wrenching up my heart. argh.
very sad. so just live for the moment and have the most fun. remember, its only the memories that will live on, so make the best of it and create more of them.
Greenday - Time of Your Life
Another turning point a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrists directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and dont ask why
Its not a question but a lesson learnt in time
Its something unpredictable,
but in the end its right,
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos and memories and dead skin on trial
For what its worth, it was worth all the while
Its something unpredictable,
but in the end its right,
I hope you had the time of your life.
One of my favouritest favourite songs ever, and it just so truly reflects what we are going thru right now. unless of cos, u are a heartless freak and dont feel any loss or feeling a pang of sadness of leaving JC for good.
leave comments abt my huge rant above. hope im right abt many of you feeling the same way. for the rest lil uns' appreciate the fact that u still have got at least a year more of fun b4 finishing regimented education. ie, JC lol!
argh. feeling really really sad now. maybe i can find solace when im back in the university. For the military, still 2 words for it. fuck you. ha!
oh wells, quite a sad thing cj doesnt have a paralithurgy like sji did. maybe we can organise one ourselves hohoho. okok, gtg slp now, having a utterly stupid 1 hr paper in the morning tomorrow.
Blessed path, warriors, and choose the right one. Cheers.
yk ranted at 11:25 pm!
the collaborators *
i cant be fucked linking!
the photographic evidence *
lies!
the incriminating evidence *
everlasting .
depression .
melodramatic .
ORANJELAIR
-yk